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by Matthew Ebel

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Crowds of millennials, children, and nostalgic thirty-somethings collide. Their faces droop towards smartphones that could reheat a frozen pizza. Some fall from cliffs like fictional lemmings, some drive into stationary objects. Some just lose weight.


Oh, it's a Pokémon thing. Got it.


Gangs of millennials
roaming through my lawn,
trampling my perennials.
what the hell is going on?
Should I get the shotgun?
Should I call the cops?
Should I batten down my windows
'til the infestation stops?

They spent years getting fat,
now they're getting unfat.
First kiss from the sunlight,
now how about that?
And long into the night,
see their faces from the glow.
They don't want to eat or sleep,
all they want to do is Go.

Eyes on a tiny screen,
balls flying through the air.
Walking into manholes,
but they don't seem to care.
Driving through the front door
of the local shopping mall.
No time to give a statement,
'cause you gotta catch 'em all.

They're renting dogs they can walk
so that people don't talk,
pointing fingers as they
shamble down the sidewalk.
Where they're going, where they come from,
no one really knows.
But they're never going home,
all they want to do is Go.

(Server's down.)

They're getting owned in the park
by an eight-year old girl.
Her parents run the gym
but they don't know how to curl.
The old folks will never understand it,
but they know the batteries won't last forever
so for now we gotta Go.


released July 27, 2016
(Yes, I know the dog-rental story was a hoax, but it was too good to pass up.)




Matthew Ebel Seattle, Washington

I call myself a piano rocker, but I’m really just kind of a goofball. I’ve been playing the piano since age 5, discovered electronic music at 12, and made this stuff my career in '99. Since then I’ve played the Grand Ole Opry, been quoted in Rolling Stone, and made a name for myself in new media. I’ve been playing piano rock full-time since 2007 and since then I’ve never looked back. ... more

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