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Baby if I told you I was loaded
would you love me any better?
Maybe if my bank account was bloated
it would mean you'd love me better.
You tell me that I'm worth it
but I know I can't compare,
so I fake my sunny stare
no one knows how much I'm scared.

I could listen to some music that I hated
if you think it sounds better.
I suppose that I could be manipulated
if you wanna make me better.
Well I can't shake this fear
that I'm not good enough I guess.
If I said i was a mess,
would you love me any less?

'Cause I can't make you love me any more.
Every day's just like the one before,
and I'm so tired of waking up
and wondering if you'll be there
when I do.

Maybe if I cleaned up all your messes
then you'd love me so much better.
If I shave my legs and wore some shorter dresses
wouldn't I look so much better?
I know you say you want me
but I don't think I'm cut out.
I keep hanging on these doubts
and my grip is giving out.

Tell if I got fake tits,
do you think I'd look better?
If I said that if you leave
I'll slit my wrists,
would it make you love me better?
I get so much attention
but it's never quite enough
and I just can't keep this up.
No I just can't keep this up.

Turn my head off for a moment,
take a breath and close my eyes.
You can see right through my smile,
this well-rehearsed disguise.
You've been holding me together
on this untamed rocket ride
keeping me from burning out
when I've been burning up inside,
you couldn't love me better if you tried.
You couldn't love me better if you tried.

And I couldn't make you love me any more
Every day's just like the years before
and I won't have to wake up wondering
if you're gonna be there when I do.


from Cognitive Dissonance, released June 23, 2017


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Matthew Ebel Seattle, Washington

I call myself a piano rocker, but I’m really just kind of a goofball. I’ve been playing the piano since age 5, discovered electronic music at 12, and made this stuff my career in '99. Since then I’ve played the Grand Ole Opry, been quoted in Rolling Stone, and made a name for myself in new media. I’ve been playing piano rock full-time since 2007 and since then I’ve never looked back. ... more

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